There’s a dog in your bag?

Once upon a time, the cell-phone was a way to chat with your friend while on the move.
It annoyed some people.

Today, after a very short evolutionary period, it’s not just a phone anymore. Through the power of wireless technology, it does just about everything except cook your dinner and iron your clothes.

Now it annoys lot more people – from fellow drivers to fellow cinema viewers.

It is probably one of the very few gadgets that can, and is expected to, perform so many different functions.

You don’t relish the thought of your washing machine doing your laundry in the morning and then washing your dishes at night, do you?

You can still use the cellphone for chatting, but consumers today look for so much more from it. They want to take pictures, shoot pictures, send pictures, watch music videos, organize themselves, play games, keep up with the news and stock prices, pay bills, check the weather, browse emails and websites, vote in elections … get the picture?

Not only does the technology wonder today come equipped with hands-free kits to help prevent you from falling foul of the law but you can also toss it on the front seat of the car and strike up a conversation through the stereo system of your car.

You can purchase airline tickets and check in for flights using your cellphone as well. What next?

Interactive games on the cellphone are predicted in some parts of the world as hotly popular. You can start your game at home and then as you drive to work, your phone rings to inform you that “your base is under attack!” and you can give instructions on your next course of life or death actions.

Drivers will no longer mind being stuck in traffic jams. Toll collections will rise as long as driving trips will mean more playing time.

Just the other day, I read about a feature that allows you to repel mosquitoes with your cellphone. A particular sound emitted by the phone promises to keep pests away. So if you’re out trekking in mosquito-infested areas, all you have to bring is your cellphone.

I wish they would come up with the same thing to repel flies. Then we Malaysians and anyone for that matter can be eating to their hearts desire at a “flies free” stall by the roadside that sells awesomely good food.

If all that isn’t enough, one mobile phone operator has begun selling handsets that allow people to indulge in some karaoke singing. These phones are being offered in
Thailand, but knowing the passion that Malaysians have for karaoke, they will be available here in no time.

Karaoke, as we all know, is best done in an acoustic-friendly room. Under ideal circumstances, singer and audience would both have a bit to drink, making even the worst of singers think they have talent, and the listeners grandmotherly patient.

You think you are getting good value from your train or bus ticket? Well, wait a while, the deal may get better. You could be getting free entertainment with the ride.

As for cellphone rings, nature sounds are already available as ring tones. A grunting pig, a roaring lion, a hissing snake, take your pick.

Imagine the scenario: a dog is barking inside your handbag. You take your phone out.

You: Hello?
Your friend: Hi, I’m at the mega sale and have spotted the perfect dress for that party.

You: Take a picture and send it to me.
Friend: But there are 25 people queueing up for the changing room.

You: Maybe you can entertain them with karaoke.
Friend: Good idea.

The phone barks again in a moment later.
Friend: Hi again. Jackpot. I got the dress. The other people bolted as soon as I started singing.

Come to think of it, it could be useful, this karaoke feature.